


the magic of your touch

by dyadinbloom



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dirty Talk, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Kylo Ren Has No Chill, Kylo Ren has magic hands, Kylo has a dirty mouth, Massage Therapist Kylo Ren, Praise Kink, Redeemed Ben Solo, Rey's mouth is also impressively naughty, Slow Burn, Slow Burn Rey/Kylo Ren, Smut, Voice Kink, love at first touch, runner Rey, this fic is a love letter to Adam Driver's hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:07:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25025149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dyadinbloom/pseuds/dyadinbloom
Summary: His hands on her body were pure magic. Her aches dissolved, her cares faded away, her mind was light and empty. With every caress of his fingers against her bare skin, she felt that she settled back into her body. Healed. Whole.Kylo is a massage therapist and Rey is a runner. He’s wonderful for soothing sore muscles but horrible for her sexual frustration.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Rose Tico, Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 89
Kudos: 362





	1. down, girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song inspiration: “Warm Water” by Banks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! This is my first modern AU and probably my first actual E rating...please enjoy and I'd love to hear what you think in the comments. :)

“Peanut, come on,” Finn was arguing. “They’re not some shady _masseuses_ or something; they’re massage therapists. A little sweat will not bother them _at all_.”

“I just think a shower would make me feel more comfortable!” Rey disagreed. “We just ran six miles and we stink.”

“Hey!” Finn interjected, indignant. “Speak for yourself. I never stink. Besides, my guy never complains.” 

Rey laughed at him. “That’s because it’s your job to tip him,” she argued, and turned up the radio in Finn’s car. With the windows rolled down and the summer breeze gusting through the car, tendrils of hair blew past her smiling hazel eyes. Rey felt light, carefree, filled with the endorphins only a race seemed to be able to give her lately. School was weighing her down, her summer term still managing to exhaust her despite only taking two classes.

“What else are you hoping to do this weekend?” Finn asked, interrupting her from her thoughts.

Rey groaned. “I have that big midterm project to prepare for,” she replied. “For Snoke’s class.”

Finn winced in sympathy. “Sounds rough,” he sympathized. “Hopefully this massage will help you be productive and clearheaded, though!”

Rey laughed. “You’re always so optimistic, Finn,” she said, shaking her head as they pulled into a parking space next to a long, low to the ground building.

“That’s me,” Finn agreed as they exited the car. “A right ray of sunshine.”

Rey rolled her eyes and walked into the building ahead of Finn, taking a moment to pause in the entryway as her eyes adjusted to the dim lighting and soothing music that was playing.

“Hello, and welcome to First Order Chiropractic and Massage,” said a statuesque blonde woman whose nametag read _Phasma_. “Do you have an appointment?”

“Yes,” Finn answered. “Rey Johnson and Finn Storm for a 1:00.”

“Ah,” Phasma replied, her regal head inclining toward her computer monitor. “Yes, a deluxe couple’s massage. We have you down for 90 minutes with two of our best. Have you been with us at First Order before?”

“I have, but Rey hasn’t,” Finn replied cheerfully, jerking his chin toward Rey. “So I got us a groupon!”

Rey snorted at his total lack of shame, while Phasma pursed her lips disapprovingly at Finn’s grin. She probably disapproved of anyone who wasn’t paying full price for their services, Rey thought, half listening to her spiel as her eyes scanned the lobby. It seemed filled with nothing but overpriced essential oils and fake plants.

“Well, welcome then. When you are called back, we ask that you remove as much clothing as you are comfortable with and drink a glass of our cucumber mint infused water. Then you may lay facedown on the tables and cover yourself with a heated sheet while you wait for your clinicians to arrive. Do you have any questions?”

Finn and Rey shook their heads, thanked her, and took a seat. Rey watched, bemused, as Phasma spoke quietly into a small mic attached to her ear. _Honestly, how fancy can you get for physical therapy,_ she wondered to herself.

“So, I have to study,” Rey picked up their earlier conversation where they’d left off. “What else are you doing this weekend?”

“Rose is having some people over, so I’m probably going to make myself scarce tonight.” Rose was Finn’s roommate and a real sweetie; Rey was happy she’d met her through Finn. 

“Not into hearing Armitage cheer for his football club?”

Finn scoffed. “There’s just no excuse for a grown man to get that angry about a sport played on a continent he doesn’t even live on.”

Rey laughed. “Not anymore, no, but football is as much a way of life across the pond as baseball is for you here, Finn.”

“Go Wookiees until the day I die,” Finn vowed fervently, and Rey was spared what she knew would be a lengthy rant when their names were called.

A small woman with her hair in two buns led them down a quiet hallway lined with doors. She paused before an open door and gestured them inside. Rey was pleasantly surprised; the room was painted with dark walls and scattered with a few more of their preferred fake plants, but it did have a skylight as well as small shelves of towels, sheets, blocks, and rollers she presumed were used for physical therapy patients. Soft music drifted into the room, filling the space with ambient sounds.

“Make yourselves comfortable. Your technicians will be in soon,” she said, closing the door behind her with a smile.

Rey and Finn wasted no time shucking their layers, accustomed to each other’s bodies as they were practically family; Finn stripped down to his athletic shorts, considered, and then removed those too before flopping down onto one of the tables. Rey snorted. “Did you decide you stank after all?”

Finn shrugged and mumbled, “yeah, those shorts stank, but whatever,” his words muffled because his face was smashed into the headrest at the top of the table.

Rey removed the baggy tee and loose shorts she’d donned after the race, leaving her in her grey sports bra and skintight hot pink running shorts. She debated removing them, and then opted to leave them on since they were veritably fused to her body with sweat, knowing that she’d loathe putting them back on after the massages, and this was supposed to be about relaxation, after all.

She draped herself over the empty table and pulled a sheet up over her body haphazardly. “It’s hot in here,” she complained to Finn as she propped her arms up over the face port.

Finn folded his arms under his chin and rolled his head to look at her. “Once you haven’t moved for 20 minutes, it gets cold, but they do a good job keeping your temperature regulated,” he reassured her. “I’m letting you have my guy today. Only the best for my Peanut!”

Rey rolled her eyes. “Aren’t you the generous one,” she muttered.

The door opened at their feet and prevented further bickering, and Rey heard the soft sounds of new people entering their room as the door shut behind them.

“Good afternoon,” the first voice spoke smoothly. “I’m Poe, and I’ll be one of your clinicians today.” Rey raised her head to smile a greeting at the man, a lean, confident guy with smooth hair and a carefully cultivated five o’clock shadow. Poe approached the head of Finn’s table and pulled up a small wheeled stool, settling down onto it to put the men at eye level. “You must be Finn,” he greeted.

“I am,” Finn replied, his voice low and rough, and Rey internally rolled her eyes. _Oh great_ , she thought. _I can already see the sparks flying._

“And this is Kylo,” Poe continued, tearing his eyes away from his appraisal of Finn’s flawless dark skin, raising his hand to gesture to his companion. “He’ll be taking care of you today, Rey.” She turned her face to the other side of the room to get a glimpse of her clinician, but was met with nothing but a wall of solid black fabric. She tried to crane her neck to see the man’s face, but he was far too tall for her to see him at this angle. After a moment, he folded his massive body onto a stool, and Rey’s breath caught in her throat. Finn had talked about Kylo’s magic hands, but he’d never told her that Kylo was _gorgeous_. Like, straight up, rock star, muscled god, _gorgeous,_ but here he was, with thick black hair, dark brown eyes, and the most edible lips she’d ever seen.

Rey shivered, thankful to have the chill of the room as an excuse for her body’s response. Kylo was _huge_ , his massive frame absolutely dwarfing hers, and he leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his spread knees and folding his hands together.

“Ah,” he murmured quietly. “The girl I’ve heard so much about.” Rey was sure her pupils dilated when she heard his deep, smooth voice. _Oh gods_ , she thought to herself. Kylo smirked, and she wondered if he could read her mind, if he could hear her inappropriate thoughts about all the inappropriate places she was suddenly desperate for him to touch.

Finn spoke up from beside her, shattering her fantasies about the magical things Kylo could do to her with those massive hands. “Yep, I never shut up in our sessions, Peanut.”

Poe began to outline what their sports massages would consist of, clearly the more talkative of two men, and Rey kept her eyes on Kylo as he finally broke eye contact to turn and pick up a few towels and a small jar of oil. She focused on steadying her breathing, the illicit wish that she’d removed _all of_ her clothing flitting across her mind before she could stop it. _Down, girl,_ she chided herself, squeezing her eyes shut. _He’s a professional, at his job, and you’re being thirsty af._

“So, if you’re comfortable, we’ll get started,” Poe was saying. “We understand you two had a race this morning and are just looking to loosen up those muscles?”

Finn replied in the affirmative, and Rey remained silent, but opened her eyes enough to peek at what Kylo was doing. He’d disappeared from her view, and she nearly yelped when she felt the sheet over her body being adjusted. He flicked his wrists professionally, the sheet billowing and then falling, draping so she was covered from the shoulders down. She wondered if Kylo had snuck a peek at her ass, or what he thought about the fact that her sports bra still covered her upper back. Rey looked over at Finn, her eyes wide, but he seemed totally relaxed at the idea of a stranger putting their hands all over his naked body. 

That was Finn, though; unselfconscious and outgoing at all times. He sent her a grin from across the tables and mouthed to her, _r_ _elax, Peanut._

Rey nodded and closed her eyes, trying to calm herself. “We’ll work from your head and shoulders, down your arms, then to your legs, and finish with your back. Then you’ll turn over and we’ll do the other side,” Poe explained. “Shall we get started, Kylo?”

Kylo must have nodded, because a moment later Rey heard Finn groan as Poe presumably began his massage. She heard Poe quietly ask how the race had gone, but tuned out their low murmuring as she tensed, waiting to feel Kylo’s hands on her, all over her, preferably _in_ her--

“Do you have any concerns or requests before we begin, Rey?” Kylo asked in that dark, velvety voice of his.

“No,” Rey said, her voice scratchy. She cleared her throat, realizing it was the first time she’d spoken, and spoke up. “No, I trust you. Your professional judgment, I mean,” she stammered, and quickly decided to just close her eyes and shut up again. She saw Kylo smirk again before her eyelids slid shut.

She felt the ghost of his touch on her scalp, his fingers hovering over her skull, his large hands framing her head. And then Kylo slid his fingers into her hair, pressing down on the base of her skull to slide beneath her signature three bun race look. Rey gasped as she felt the pressure of his hands lifting her hair to massage her scalp and relieve an ache she hadn’t even known was there.

She tried to steady her breathing as Kylo’s thumbs ghosted behind her ears, slowly rubbing against her bones, and Rey felt warmth slide languidly down her spine, suffusing her limbs. She exhaled, feeling like a happy puppy content in its master’s arms.

Kylo remained silent as he moved his fingers steadily out from beneath her hair and applied more pressure to her neck. Soon his thumbs slid down to frame her spine and his hands smoothed down her shoulders, catching a bit on the straps of her sports bra. His fingers were hot, his hands rough but gliding effortlessly over her skin with the practiced movements of his strokes, softened by the oil he’d rubbed onto them. Breathing in deeply, she noticed it had been scented with something cool and earthy--eucalyptus, perhaps?

Kylo spoke as he began rubbing the outsides of her shoulders, squeezing and then pressing down on her deltoids. “Is this okay?”

“Yes,” Rey whispered.

“Your shoulders seem very tense,” he commented, his deep voice low, resonating in her body as he leaned over her a bit to rub down her scapulae and slide back up to her collarbones. He massaged in rhythmic circles and Rey found herself melting into the table. She didn’t think she could move if the building were to catch fire.

She grunted some sort of sound of agreement but was too blissed out to form words, so she didn’t tell Kylo that yes, she was stressed, that yes, she had to keep up her grades in her mechanical engineering classes to maintain her scholarship, that yes, she had to work two jobs to pay for expenses her scholarship didn’t cover, that yes, she ran to relieve stress because Maker knew she hadn’t gotten laid in months, that yes, his touch was stirring up all kinds of tension in her body that she knew she’d be relieving with her vibrator tonight.

With her eyes closed, she could still feel Kylo’s body heat, his black shirt brushing against her hair as he leaned over her back to massage her biceps and triceps in tandem. His hands glided smoothly up and down her arms and she entered a dreamlike state, fantasizing that she was some sort of royalty being pampered by a very sexy attendant, or even that she was just a normal woman whose loving partner was spoiling her after a long, hard week.

She could barely hear the murmurs of Poe and Finn on the other side of the room, the sounds of Kylo’s oil-slicked fingers sliding over her skin taking up most of her mental capacity. He gently rearranged the sheet as he moved down one arm, massaging her hands individually, keeping whatever part of her body he wasn’t touching demurely covered.

After finishing her arms, Kylo stepped away from her body to coat his hands again in oil, then moved to the foot of the bed. Her eyes tightly shut, Rey could sense him more than feel him; he gently folded the sheet so one of her legs was exposed to him. He pressed his knuckles into the arch of her foot, _hard_ , and Rey _jumped_ in surprise. A little shriek escaped her mouth as her eyes flew open, and she made eye contact with Finn, who was grinning at her. _Good, huh?_ he mouthed at her.

Rey’s eyes rolled back in her head as she felt Kylo’s fingers span her ankles, his thumb almost touching his index finger as he massaged up her ankle, to her calf, and behind her knee. Rey knew her breathing had picked up, knew that she had somehow gone from a state of bliss to a state of heightened awareness, as his powerful hands traveled further up her leg. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, willing herself not to shift her thighs around or spread her legs to encourage him to massage her where she was beginning to crave he would. She counted her breaths as Kylo’s fingers rubbed her thighs, and he made a sympathetic crooning sound. “Your hamstrings are very tight. You should stretch more after you run,” he commented.

Rey’s brows furrowed, always sensitive to criticism, and her eyes slitted open to see him looking at her, the muscles in his forearms flexing as he worked her thighs. His thumb kneaded her hip, just at the edge of her running shorts, and Rey gulped as she felt his fingers slide down behind her leg, the tips squeezing her inner thigh and rubbing right under her ass.

She couldn’t maintain eye contact with him touching her like this; she knew her running shorts were wet now, not just from sweat, but from the sensations this man was stirring up in her. If he were to graze his fingertips just a bit higher, he could touch her, feel her wetness, feel how hot she was for him--he could cup her ass in his hands and rip her shorts down, plunging two of his thick fingers inside of her--

Kylo pulled the sheet back down over her leg and moved around the foot of the bed to her other side. Rey exhaled shakily, willing her overheated body to _calm the fuck down_ , and she lifted her head to turn her face toward him and covertly watch him work.

By the time he’d finished her other leg, Rey was so keyed up she thought if she shifted her hips just right to get some friction on her clit that she could come from just watching his big hands on her small body. But as he pulled the sheet down, folding it over her lower back, and began to rub her neck again, she held herself still. She felt Kylo’s fingertips slide beneath the edges of her sports bra, which somehow seemed far more erotic than if she’d just removed it to let his hands roam her back freely. His long fingers crept beneath the elastic, massaging out from her spine toward her ribcage, and she bit back a moan as his hands easily spanned the entirety of her back, framing her waist as he slid them up and down her body. He removed his fingers to place them at the base of her spine, thumbs working gently outward, pressing her belly down into the table, and Rey tensed. She was already so close, she could actually come from this, just from him pushing her clit down into the sheet, from the feel of his magical hands--

He abruptly gentled his touch and slid his hands up her back, and Rey gasped in frustration. Kylo seemed to hear her thoughts, as he moved his hands firmly back down her spine towards her ass, gripping her hips tightly as his fingers spanned her body, pressing down, down, and electricity began to tingle in her core, and then he removed his hands _again--_

Rey cried out in frustration, _loudly_. Kylo’s hands immediately vanished from her skin and her eyes flew open. “Are you okay?” he asked, worried. She looked at him, eyes wide, then over to Finn’s table, where he and Poe were also looking at her in concern.

“Yeah,” she gasped. “Must have hit a sore spot or something.” She closed her eyes in mortification and tried to calm herself down. _Jesus Christ Rey you almost gave yourself an orgasm in a room filled with three men and not one of them was a willing participant what the fuck is wrong with you_ \--

And then Kylo’s hands were on her flesh again and a loud, lusty moan was escaping her mouth without her knowledge and his fingers froze on her back. Rey’s eyes flew open, her cheeks flushed, her chest heaving, and she pushed herself up on her elbows. “I’m sorry,” she stuttered. “I think I have an injury or something-- _ouch_ \--I, I probably should come back another day, this feels-- _yikes_ , ouch--sorry,” she stumbled over her words, sitting up and wrapping the sheet around her body. She glanced around frantically, the mystified eyes of all three men trained on her.

Rey could _not_ endure another 45 minutes of this, nope, no way, no how. She was stumbling off the bed, leaping to grab her clothes and shoes. “Bye Finn, I’ll grab an Uber, you stay and enjoy yourself....thanks Kylo, sorry--” she grinned insanely and tried to wave an apology as she stumbled toward the door, and the sheet was slipping and she had to let it fall to escape, dashing half-naked out into the hallway, and she slammed the door closed, leaving all three men gaping, frozen in place, behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and thanks to my pals in the Writing Den for your feedback, encouragement, and help!


	2. back for more

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a very awkward end to their first encounter, Rey and Kylo meet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the love on chapter one of this fic! I hope you enjoy this update. :) Thanks again to @reylomoodies for this gorgeous moodboard! It inspires me for sure!

Rey decided to skip the elevator and climb the three floors to her apartment, just to punish herself. She pushed open her door by banging her forehead into it.

“Idiot, Rey,” she griped to herself. “Moron, dumbass, bloody wanker!” 

She stripped off her clothes as she made her way to the shower, leaving them in wrinkled masses on the floor. Naked, she stared at herself in the mirror as she yanked her hair out of its three buns. Even after at least a half an hour, her chest and neck were still flushed, her pupils dilated, her breathing unsteady.

 _Dammit, she still wanted him_.

Kylo, with those perfect hands and massive thighs and wide chest in a black shirt, those long fingers and those expansive palms and those rough moves he made over her body while he massaged her into a frenzy.

Rey continued to grumble to herself as she turned on the shower to its coldest setting. The trouble was, it wasn’t his fault that she was behaving like a sex-crazed fiend. He was just doing his job, being a perfect amazing miraculous massage therapist, and she was just the poor girl who happened to be at his mercy on the table--in the room with her best friend and _his_ clinician, no less.

Rey yelped as she stepped into the freezing spray of her shower, the cold water blasting some of her angst away as she let herself cool down, mind and body, her forehead resting against the cool tiles of the shower.

Much to her chagrin, Rey slowly became aware that the cold water was making goosebumps prickle all over her body, her nipples tightening, her hair dripping down into her face. Water sluiced down her torso, sliding tantalizingly over her center, and with a groan, Rey resigned herself to the fact that she was just too keyed up not to take care of herself sooner rather than later.

She closed her eyes and slid her hand down her body, fingers dipping into her center to find herself embarrassingly wet. She pressed two fingers inside herself, hooking them so they massaged her clit, and she let out a groan so wanton it seemed to echo off the tiles in mockery.

She slapped her other palm against the wall, crooking one knee so she had better access to her center, and tried her best to be respectful toward Kylo, even as she objectified him in her fantasy. She imagined he was here, behind her, his big body dwarfing hers as he pressed against her back, his fingers rubbing just right inside her, his deep voice growling filthy words of praise in her ear. 

Rey gasped as she felt herself nearing her peak with dizzying intensity; she threw her head back and added another finger, knowing Kylo’s would be much bigger, would fill her up so well, could get so deep inside her, and imagined how much he would love making her feel good--

She came with a scream, her body tensing under the water, and she panted as she came back to herself. She slid her fingers out of her body and showered off the most emotionally absurd day in recent memory. By the time she stumbled out of the shower and collapsed on her bed, she could barely keep her eyes open, and she quickly fell into a blissfully dreamless nap.

* * *

Rey woke with a grunt, her face creased with sheet lines, to the insistent tones of her phone ringing. She rubbed her eyes and yawned, slowly rolling over and squinting at the late afternoon light. The embarrassment of the morning came rushing back to her and she groaned, covering her eyes with her forearm.

Her phone began ringing again and she grabbed it, answering without bothering to open her eyes.

“PEANUT!” Finn all but shrieked. “Are you okay? WHAT was that about?!”

“I’m sorry, Finn,” she began. “I must have just tweaked a muscle or something--”

“Oh come on, Rey,” he cut her off. “That was not a screech of pain I heard from you. That was a sex noise!”

Rey spluttered, “I don’t know what you--”

“Peanut,” he interrupted gently. “It’s okay, I’m not judging. Kylo is hotter than hot, and if he were into men, I’d have been all over that, too.”

“Was I really so obvious?” Rey slid a palm down her face, exhaling through her hand.

“Probably not to Kylo or Poe, but I’m sure they’ve heard those sounds before from clients.”

“I’m so embarrassed, Finn. I hope I haven’t ruined everything. I’d feel awful if you couldn’t go back to him.”

Finn chuckled. “Don’t worry, I wasn’t planning on seeing Kylo again anyway. He’s all yours. Poe, now--Poe is a different story.”

“Thirsty little Finn,” she teased, glad the heat was off her. “Tell me more.”

“Well, after you so insanely departed, there wasn’t any reason for Kylo to stick around. Poe and I enjoyed some quality alone time,” he said suggestively.

Rey spluttered, distracted enough by this mental image not to fixate overmuch on Kylo. “Finn, don’t tell me you and Poe-- _on the table_ \--”

Finn groaned. “No, Peanut. I _do_ have standards. But I may not be able to exercise quite so much self control at our next appointment.”

Rey laughed at him, glad the focus was off her for now. As Finn caught her up on how he and Poe had exchanged numbers, and how sexy he thought he was, and a myriad of other things, Rey meandered her apartment, straightening up from her disheveled sprawl toward her shower.

When Finn ended the call, Rey tidied her desk area and got ready to hit the books. She couldn’t help but wonder what Kylo was doing this evening. Was he thinking about her? Was he disgusted, creeped out, completely baffled? Was he hanging out with a girlfriend? Or, worse...had he not even thought about her at all?

Rey groaned and thunked her head into a textbook. She needed to put Kylo out of her mind; she’d ensured that she never had a chance with him thanks to her bizarre behavior. With that depressing thought, she doubled down on studying like the nerd she was, working late into the night, alone. 

_Just the way I like it_ , she told herself.

But even as she tried to savor her solitude, Rey knew she was lying to herself. 

There was nothing worse than being alone.

* * *

For Rey, Sunday passed in a blur of homework, chores, and a quick run. She tried to keep Kylo out of her mind, but he crept in when she wasn’t paying attention--when she stretched carefully after her two miles, when she washed her sports bras, when she read a chapter for Snoke’s class about the importance of the connection between an engineer’s hands and mind.

The sexual frustration and embarrassment didn’t abate Monday as she trekked around campus, submitting her project and dashing to the library to cram in a quick lunchtime study session before her afternoon classes and her job. By the time she was on the bus from class to work, she was frazzled, but less so about Kylo and more so about the general insanity of her life.

She was mindlessly scrolling Instagram, absently liking Rose’s pictures from her weekend with Armitage, when her screen lit up with a call from a local number she didn’t recognize. Curious, she answered.

“Hello?”

“Miss Johnson?” asked a smooth female voice.

“Yes?” Rey answered hesitantly.

“This is Phasma from First Order Chiropractic and Massage calling to follow up about your appointment this weekend.”

 _Oh, shit,_ Rey thought to herself. They were going to sue her for sexual harassment, or ban her from the premesis, or post on social media that she was not to be trusted in any public areas where men were present--

“We understand you had an emergency that took you away from your full session, and your clinician asked me to reach out to reschedule the duration of your appointment. Are you available tomorrow afternoon?”

“What?” Rey asked, completely blank.

“Kylo has a cancellation tomorrow afternoon, and he can fit you in at 4:00, if you’re available.” Phasma sounded bored with this whole conversation and obviously had no idea of the about-face Rey’s emotions were currently performing. He wanted to see her again?

 _Don’t be a fool_ , she chided herself. He doesn’t want to _see_ you, see you, she thought. He’s just being professional.

Rey knew she should decline, that she should just walk away from the whole experience and try her best to forget it. But the prospect of feeling Kylo’s touch once more, and being in a room with him alone, no less…

“Sure,” she heard herself saying. “I can do 4:00 tomorrow.”

“Excellent,” Phasma replied. “We shall see you then.”

Rey hung up the phone, feeling like she may have just been hit by the bus she was currently riding.

She wondered fleetingly if she had time to get a wax between now and tomorrow.

* * *

The next 24 hours crawled by, but Rey distracted herself as best she could with a shift at the garage, a long session with her vibrator afterword, an early morning run of shame the next day, her classes, and studying. Through it all, she thought. She thought about how she would approach the situation, what she would say to Kylo, how she could hopefully make him comfortable around her, the way she might be able to suggest to him that he give her a massage with a classic happy ending--

Not really. But a girl could dream.

When she finally found herself pushing open the door of First Order and stepping into the reception area, she felt as prepared as she could have been. She greeted Phasma, who reminded her that her shortened session was already paid for and that the tip had also been generously provided by Finn.

Rey tried to calm her racing heart as she waited to be called, and soon heard her name uttered by the same pigtailed woman who’d led her into the back last time.

“Back again so soon?” the young woman asked, smiling as she led Rey to a room. Rey just laughed and shrugged.

After the woman, whose nametag had read _Kaydel_ , departed, Rey took deep breaths as she stripped off her shirt and bra, her heart pounding. She slid her jean shorts down her meticulously shaved legs and folded them as well, carefully adjusting the pile so her bra wouldn’t be visible. She left her boyshort panties on, acutely aware of her near-nude state. Rey turned to the table and draped the white sheet around herself, clutching the fabric together in front of her chest, and perched on the table, waiting to meet Kylo head on.

Rey had just decided her strategy—to inhabit the role of the unapologetic, sex-positive regnant of her fantasies, or to at least _pretend_ to be one—when she heard the door open. Her hazel eyes flicked to the handle as it slowly turned and moved to reveal Kylo’s imposing, black-clad figure. She gazed up at him, still significantly larger than her even though she was sitting up on the high table now. His eyes were warm and intense, but she didn’t sense discomfort or unease in them.

“Hello, Rey,” Kylo greeted, interrupting her thoughts. He turned to shut the door behind him, and when he faced her again, he added, “I’m glad you could come for me again today.”

Rey choked and her eyes went wide. Kylo continued smoothly, seemingly oblivious of how she was interpreting his phrasing. “My schedule can get a little full, so it’s good you could make it.”

Rey cleared her throat. “Of course.” She gulped, then continued. “I’m so sorry to have left early last time. I don’t know why I reacted so strongly.” She looked at him, thinking that that was the most honest thing she could think of to say.

“It’s no trouble. Many of my clients experience discomfort with some of the…sensations massage therapy can evoke.” Kylo smiled and began to move around the room, grabbing a towel and a bottle of oil in one large hand and a foam roller in the other. “Let’s get started, and today, please feel free to tell me how what I’m doing is making you feel.”

Rey held her tongue, as the feelings he tended to provoke in her were distinctly x-rated, and thus unfit for sharing. 

“Lie down on your back for me today, Rey.” He turned away to give her some privacy as she shifted the sheet and arranged her body on the table, the fabric pulled up to her neck. 

He waited until she was silent and turned to adjust the sheet, moving her legs and arms beneath the thin white fabric as he went. Rey kept her eyes on him the whole time, mesmerized by his large hands, his intense eyes, and the controlled power he exuded. 

Kylo reached up to her hair, skimming his fingers over her three buns. “Are you comfortable with these in?”

“Oh,” Rey said. “No, I guess not. Let me take them out.” She moved her arms to do so but he stilled her with a gesture. 

“Let me.” Kylo moved to the head of the bed, looking at her from his upside down vantage point, and Rey couldn’t take her eyes off the hypnotic sight of him giving her his complete and utter focus. He looked even larger from this angle, and their size difference was doing _things_ to Rey. 

Kylo pulled the elastic from her top bun, massaging her scalp and gently carding his long fingers through her hair to untangle it. Rey felt her breathing hitch in pleasure as he started on the middle bun, one hand cradling her neck to lift her head while he undid the knot and stretched her hair out once more.

Rey gulped and continued staring at him, drinking in the way his hair fell around his face, mapping the moles and freckles she could see this close. Kylo kept his eyes firmly on her hair, his expression neutral, as he untied her bottom bun, looping all three hair ties around his thick wrist, spreading her hair out beneath her head and releasing her skull to allow her to lie flat on the table.

“Thank you,” Rey whispered, and he finally looked into her eyes.

“Of course,” he said, then placed his fingers firmly on either side of her head, framing her face. Rey had the fleeting thought that he was a powerful man and could probably crush her skull if he wanted to, but his touch was nothing but gentle as he pressed the heels of his hands into her temples, making her groan and close her eyes in bliss.

“That feels nice,” she murmured.

“I’m glad,” Kylo replied, his deep voice vibrating down his arms and into her body. “You’re doing a good job communicating how you’re feeling. Please continue.”

He was so calm, and for some reason, his professional detachment was as much of a turn-on for Rey as his touch was.

She closed her eyes and tried to relax and enjoy herself, but that lasted only as long as it took Kylo to remove his hands from her head and slide his fingers along her neck. The moment she felt his skin touch hers, she tensed up, her body tingling from head to toe.

“Relax, Rey,” he soothed, continuing to massage her trapezius muscles, making long swipes down from her neck to her shoulders. 

“Sorry,” she apologized, eyes closed. “I guess I’m just not used to being touched.” _Fuck, why did I say that?!_

She thought she felt Kylo freeze for just an instant at her confession, but then he continued his work smoothly. He folded the sheet back so the skin above her breasts was exposed, and lifted her arms gently to place them over the sheet. 

Rey opened her eyes to look at him as he moved to her right side, massaging down her arm and reaching for her fingers.

“Your hands are quite callused. Do you mind my asking what you do for work?”

Rey cleared her throat. “I’m a mechanic, but just part time. I’m still in school as well.”

Kylo hummed. “That explains some of your tension. Manual labor plus studying equals stress.” He smiled as he massaged her fingers, tangling his own into hers and pulling outward so she felt like her joints were being pleasantly loosened. As Rey let her eyes travel from his big hands dwarfing hers, up his muscular arms, to his handsome face, more and more heat gathered in the center of her body. She closed her eyes, knowing if he looked at her he’d know she was lewdly ogling him.

“It’s okay, Rey,” he soothed, tugging her fingers one by one. She opened her eyes to see his brown ones gazing limpidly back into hers. “Relax. It’s okay to relax.”

Rey felt tears prick her eyes, inexplicably. Relaxation was something she just...didn’t do. Didn’t have time for. Never had.

She blinked back tears as Kylo moved to the other side of the bed, and her breath hitched as he picked up her left hand. She shuddered, her body moving from emotional to aroused so quickly it gave her whiplash.

“You’re about to apologize again. Don’t,” he ordered firmly, somehow predicting what she was about to say. “You aren’t accustomed to massage therapy. You’ll get used to it eventually.” He smiled, and Rey allowed herself a small smile back, thinking, _yeah, right. I’ll never get used to your hands on me_.

It was as though he could hear her thoughts, because he smirked and slid his fingertips gently up her arm, trailing them back down when her skin broke out in goosebumps. Rey was losing her mind, staring at his long fingers as they easily circled her forearm, and she felt lightheaded from how unsteadily she was breathing. 

Kylo held her gaze as he leaned over her, rubbing both her shoulders simultaneously. He was so close...she could lift up and kiss him if she wanted to. She shuddered out a gasp as he pressed down on her body, pinning her to the table and stretching her back and neck deliciously. Rey moaned quietly, and her eyes flashed to his, embarrassed.

“Don’t be afraid,” he murmured, his lips inches from hers. “I feel it too.” Rey could feel his breath on her cheek as Kylo continued to push and pull on her shoulders, and she felt her body lightening. She groaned again wantonly at the tension being released, her eyes meeting his nervously.

“Very good,” he crooned. “I’m glad to know this feels good for you.”

Rey let her eyes roll back in her head as she thought about how filthily she’d like to communicate just how good her body was feeling right now. _That feels amazing, Kylo, now please fuck me_ , she imagined saying. She somehow kept her mouth shut, but continued to breathe heavily, her gasps punctuated by quiet moans of relief, as his hands worked over her upper body. He slowly gentled his movements, pulling her arms down to her sides as he replaced the sheet over her body and moved to the foot of the bed.

As he lifted the sheet over one of her legs, Rey shivered when the cold air touched her body. Kylo poured a bit more oil into his hands and slid his fingers quickly up and down her leg to coat her skin with a thin sheen of the product. Rey shivered again at the contact, groaning as he squeezed her foot. She imagined anyone walking down the hall might think he was fucking her, given the noises she was making.

“How did you get into massage therapy?” Rey blurted, desperate to distract herself. He was silent for a moment. “Sorry,” she stammered. “Maybe that’s too personal.”

“It’s okay,” he said quietly, working on her ankle and calf muscles. Rey thought he wasn’t going to reply, but her eyes snapped to his lips when he spoke. “I joined the military when I graduated from college. I did three tours over two and a half years, and I just...grew to hate it.” Kylo was quiet for a moment, and she watched his jaw clench. “I saw so much pain. Brutality. Ugliness. War is hell.

“And I hated the things I had to do. So when I was discharged, I knew I never wanted to raise a hand in violence to anyone ever again. This seemed like a good place to start.”

Rey was quiet, utterly spellbound by the intoxicating combination of his words, delivered in that gorgeous voice, and the magic of his touch, so potent on her body.

“I’m sorry that happened to you,” Rey murmured. “But I’m glad you decided to make a change. Sometimes that’s the hardest part.”

Kylo hummed in agreement as he covered her leg with the sheet again and moved to the other side of the table. He folded back the fabric and worked quietly for a few moments before speaking.

“Thank you for saying that,” he said, and in that moment, he looked just a little less like a sex fantasy to her and a little more like a mortal man: vulnerable yet strong; cocky yet unsure.

Kylo worked on her legs in silence for a time and with his honesty, Rey felt herself relaxing, her body shifting from being made tense by his touch to completely and utterly calmed, albeit still aroused. They continued murmuring quietly to one another as he slid the roller under her calf and moved her leg along it to stretch her hamstrings. They chatted about school—he, too, was taking classes to get an additional certification, and she told him about how much Snoke’s class sucked balls—and she took pleasure in making him laugh.

After she’d rolled over so he could work on her back—through Rey’s protests that he’d already _done_ that during their Saturday session, to which he’d just shushed her and carried on—they talked about running, and he gave her tips on stretches. His hands on her body still felt sinful, but she was calmer, more in tune with her body, less ashamed of the involuntary gasps and groans that escaped her mouth and punctuated their conversations.

By the time he’d finished, Rey felt more at ease with Kylo. She wasn't just thirsting after him; she _liked_ him as a person.

“Thank you,” she murmured, sincerely grateful, but also sad that she wasn’t going to be feeling his touch again. There was no way she could afford the luxury of regular massages.

They stared at one another for a moment, Rey uncertain about how to move from her prone position without flashing him, and Kylo seemingly hesitant to let their session end as well.

“Will you come back?” he blurted. “I mean—I would like it if you did.”

Rey smiled. “I wish I could,” she said. “I just don’t think I have the time or money.”

Kylo’s brow furrowed. “Oh, didn’t Finn tell you? I’m still training, so my rate is half that of the other therapists. And we have shorter session options.”

Rey did some quick mental math. If she worked just one extra shift every few weeks at the garage, she could swing it. And it would be worth it in spades, she reasoned, if she felt better, was less stressed, _and_ got to see Kylo.

She nodded at him. “I’d like to come back,” she said shyly. Kylo rewarded her with the first grin she’d seen from him, and just like that, she was half in love with him again already. His cheeks creased, dimples peeking at her, and she was disarmed by his endearingly imperfect eyeteeth. “Maybe just for an hour at a time though? Every other week?”

Kylo smiled. “I can work with that. Does this day and time work for you?” Rey nodded. “I’ll speak with Phasma, then,” he said, and his smile ratcheted up to a full-blown grin. “See you in two weeks.”

“See you then,” Rey replied with a smile. Kylo opened the door to leave, then turned back to her and paused. Rey propped herself up on an elbow so she could see him.

“Thank you, Rey,” he murmured. Her mouth opened, to argue that she should be the one thanking him, but with a quick smile, he was gone and she heard the door click quietly shut behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh, sweet Rey.
> 
> Fun fact: Kylo's backstory is inspired by Bob Ross, who was a drill sergeant and after leaving the military resolved to never raise his voice again. True story.
> 
> Next time we get to see Kylo's POV, and things will heat up again!


	3. this has to stop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get to see Kylo's side of the story, and the relationship between Kylo and Rey gets a little more comfortable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little Kylo POV to start your weekend right! Enjoy! :)
> 
> Thank you again to the gorgeous @reylomoodies for this excellent moodboard.

Kylo couldn’t help himself anymore. The sight of Rey’s bare back beneath him on the table, her slim body so pliant and relaxed under his, the sheen of her tanned skin slick with oil.

He had fantasized so often about the sounds she’d make if he just kept sliding his hands up her thighs until his fingers were buried inside her. The moan he’d get her to make if he took his aching cock from his pants and stuffed her mouth full as he leaned over her to massage her clit.

And so now, here he was, two fingers deep inside Rey, her hips writhing on the table and her typical moans and gasps so much louder than they normally were. She cried out his name, begging him, pleading with him to just fuck her, to make her feel so good, to fill her with his cum. He yanked her off the table and bent her over it, loving the sight of her lithe legs stretching on tiptoes.

Kylo shoved into her in one long stroke, and tore a scream from Rey’s throat. Fuck, he loved hearing her make sounds like that, loved to watch her body move under his as he pounded relentlessly into her. He watched her ass shake as he slammed his hips into her, watched her stretch out her arms to hang onto the edge of the table, listened to the sweet sounds of her begging him to fuck her harder and deeper—

He wanted to see her face, to look at those hazel eyes as they were filled with lust, to see that rosy flush spread up her neck to her cheeks, to watch her hair fall over her eyes as he fucked her ruthlessly. _Look at me_ , he growled. 

Nothing.

Why wouldn’t she look at him? _Rey!_ he commanded. _Look at me when I’m fucking you._

She didn’t turn around, but instead, started to laugh softly even as she pushed her body back harder against his. And then Kylo _knew—_

* * *

 _“Arrrghhhhh!!!”_ Kylo woke from the dream with a growl of frustration. He stared at the ceiling, gasping for breath, and he slammed a fist into his mattress. _Goddamnit,_ he’d been dreaming about Rey.

Again.

And yet again, for the umpteenth night in a row, he woke with a rock hard cock and no Rey.

Kylo groaned and flung his forearm over his eyes, reaching down to grasp his dick in his hand. He’d given up on wearing pants to bed after the tenth night straight he’d woken with a borderline painful erection that he couldn’t get to go away until he took care of it.

It was the work of no more than a minute to lose himself in the images the dream had offered, the tantalizing allure of Rey’s sweet scent, her slim neck, her little waist, her tight ass—

He came with a grunt, ropes of cum spurting onto his chest and sheets. Sweating and gasping, he stared at the ceiling.

This had to stop.

* * *

Kylo knew Rey would be trouble when he first stepped into the room. As he and Poe entered the tiny space, he was greeted by the sight of a round ass topped with a slim waist, tan arms propping up a head whose brunette locks were held back in three buns.

But her _laugh_ —her tinkling, musical laugh—it was what aroused him in an instant.

And then after Poe had given his spiel, and Kylo had looked into Rey’s eyes for the first time, he fell a little deeper at the golden hazel of her gaze, at the sight of her pupils dilating as she took him in.

And then when she _spoke,_ when he’d asked her a question and she’d replied in that lilting British accent—he knew he was a goner.

And then when he pushed on her back and she’d let out a moan, he went rock hard in his loose black work pants. _Fuck_. He was so fucked.

Luckily, Rey had dashed out of that first appointment for whatever reason—maybe she was terrified of his size, maybe he’d hurt her with his hands, as he’d hurt so many others—but at least he was spared the painful embarrassment of sporting an erection in the _least_ professional setting possible.

He’d left the room quickly after Rey, leaving Poe and Finn to their own devices, and had stewed about Rey for the rest of the weekend. If he’d hurt her, or made her uncomfortable, he had to make amends.

And if she was utterly gorgeous and Kylo was desperate to see her again, well, that was something else entirely.

So when he’d had the receptionist call to invite Rey back to finish her session, and she’d agreed, he’d spent a full 24 hours sweating about what he’d do this time to make sure she was comfortable. 

When she’d returned, they’d talked. He’d teased her a bit, keen to figure out if his interest was reciprocated, but she seemed awkward and embarrassed at his innuendoes, so he’d switched back to his professional mien. When she’d asked him about his start as a massage therapist, though, Kylo had been a little too honest, revealing a truth he wasn’t sure he’d ever even admitted to himself before.

He didn’t like to think about the past, about the vicious and violent acts his hands had committed. He was done holding on. Kylo didn’t know where his future was leading him, but he was determined to go down a lighter path, to use his hands for good, to help people instead of hurt them.

Kylo pondered all of this as he sat in the little break room at First Order, sipping his afternoon coffee as he stretched his long legs out in front of him. His Tuesday afternoons had gotten a whole lot brighter when he’d begun to look forward to Rey’s appointments every other week, and he smiled to himself a little knowing she’d be arriving in just a few minutes.

His musings were shattered as the door burst open and Poe sauntered in.

“Hey, buddy,” Poe greeted him. Kylo did little more than nod and raise his coffee to the shorter man, who was busy rummaging around the fridge. 

“Is this your long night?” Poe asked, finally securing a bottle of juice and looking at Kylo as he unscrewed the cap and took a long swig.

“No, that’s tomorrow,” Kylo answered.

“Ahh, that’s right,” Poe said, nodding. “Tuesday is Rey day.” He smirked and Kylo merely rolled his eyes. “Do you have anybody after her? Or did you start canceling so you could leave right after her appointment?”

“I didn’t ‘start canceling,’ Poe,” Kylo scowled. “I just have a short day on Tuesdays, that’s all.”

“Uh huh,” Poe said. “Well, have you made any progress there?”

Kylo frowned. “I don’t know. She still seems awfully tense.”

Poe nearly spit out his juice. “Well, yeah,” he spluttered.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Are you joking, man?” Poe looked genuinely shocked. “You mean to tell me that you haven’t—you know what, never mind.”

Kylo stood. “I haven’t what, Poe?”

Poe stared up at his friend. “You really have no idea, do you,” he said, incredulous.

“Idea about what?”

Poe just laughed and shook his head. “You know what, you’ll figure it out, pal. And if you don’t...well—” Poe snapped his mouth shut when Kaydel poked her head into the room.

“Kylo, your 4:00 is here,” she said. “Hey, Poe.”

“Kay, have you _seen_ Kylo’s 4:00?” Poe asked.

“Rey?” Kaydel said, grinning. “Yeah, she’s so nice. We chat every time I walk her back. What about her?”

“She’s hot, right?” Poe asked, and Kylo gulped.

“I mean, don’t let Phasma hear me say this, but _definitely_.” She winked.

“Guys, don’t talk about her like that,” Kylo said, his voice deep.

Poe looked at Kaydel, and for some odd reason, they both started cracking up. “Ohhh, buddy, you’ve got it bad,” Poe guffawed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kylo said, deciding to take the high road. “I gotta run.” He tossed the rest of his coffee and strode out, his long legs carrying him quickly down the hallway.

Kaydel laughed. “He’s good at so many things, but telling when a woman is into him is _not_ one of them, huh?”

Poe shook his head, grinning. “Our sweet, sweet Kylo. He’ll figure it out eventually.”

* * *

Kylo paused in front of Rey’s door and took a deep breath. _Okay, buddy; this is just another day of having to keep your shit together; you can do it._ Christ, was he giving himself or his dick a pep talk?

Rolling his eyes, he knocked softly on the door. “Rey?”

“Come in!” she replied.

Kylo opened the door, and there she was in all her sunny glory, the sheet draped around her body, a megawatt smile on her face. He found his own lips curving in response.

“Hi, Rey,” he greeted her. “Good weekend?”

“Oh, you know. More of the same,” she replied, and he moved around the room, gathering his supplies. “I ran another 10K, wrote a paper, worked a shift at the garage.” Rey lay back on the table, adjusting the sheet over her body.

“How was your race?” he asked, coming to straighten her head and tuck the sheet neatly over her arms. Rey seemed to prefer that he work on her front first; they chatted, and she got quieter and more relaxed as they moved through the session.

“It was...good,” she replied evasively. Kylo hummed as he pulled the elastic from her hair, enjoying the way it spilled down over his fingers. It had become something of a ritual for him; greet Rey, lie her down, take out her hair, wait for her to get comfortable enough to talk to him.

She sighed beneath him, his fingers smoothing her chestnut locks into order, looping the hair tie around his wrist. He’d definitely ‘forgotten’ to return several of them; he kept them in a little pile on his desk at home.

“I ran a PR,” Rey blurted, her eyes wide as she gazed up at him. Kylo smiled down at her, enjoying this upside down vantage point they always began with.

“Good job, Rey,” he praised her. She shivered beneath the sheet—maybe she was cold? His brow furrowed as he looked toward the thermostat anxiously. When he looked back down, Rey was biting her lip and breathing deeply, as she was wont to do when they first got started. Every time he saw her, she was a ball of nerves. Her muscles were tight, her limbs locked, her eyes blinking rapidly. He considered it a personal victory every time she left the building relaxed and pliable.

 _If I had her in my bed every night, she’d be pliable, all right,_ he thought to himself, before quickly shutting down that line of thought.

“Tell me about your next race,” he requested, beginning to massage her head and neck. She told him, brokenly, about her race schedule; her runs this summer would lengthen into the fall until she ran a full marathon in September. It took her until he was rubbing her shoulders to finish the description, since she was gasping and moaning so frequently as he relieved her tension.

 _Poor girl_ , Kylo thought. Always so tense. Always carrying so much on her small shoulders. He wished there was something he could do to help her, to make her life easier.

“What do you do for exercise?” Rey was asking. Kylo had moved on to her arms and hands, massaging a thicker lotion into her palms to help soothe the calluses he’d grown accustomed to finding there. He loved this part of their sessions; it felt intimate, holding her hand, looking into her eyes, talking.

“I’m more of a lifter than a runner,” he admitted. “I like to work out in the morning. Clear my head before I start the day.”

“Where do you go? To work out, I mean,” she added, her eyes closing in bliss as he hit a particularly good spot on her hands.

“I live pretty close to Resistance Fitness, so I go there,” he said.

Rey’s eyes snapped open and she grinned. “No kidding! I live right by there, too!”

Kylo had to grin. “Do you do any strength training? It would help you with your running, you know.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “Like I have time for that. Running and school take up enough of my time.”

“We should meet up sometime. I could show you some easy workouts.” Kylo cleared his throat. “If you wanted to, I mean.”

Rey smiled shyly at him. “I’d like that.”

They lapsed into a familiar silence as he worked out the tension in her legs, Rey’s breathing growing deeper and slower as she continued to relax. Meanwhile, Kylo daydreamed about the possibility of seeing Rey first thing in the morning, getting to teach her proper form as she practiced squats, maybe pressing up against her back, perhaps supporting her ass with his hands as she bent her knees…

He was yanked from his fantasies by the sound of a soft snore from Rey. Kylo blinked his eyes in disbelief. Here he was, daydreaming about groping her, and she’d fallen asleep on him.

He laughed softly and removed his hands from her body, covering her with the sheet, and took a moment to drink her in as she rested. It did _something_ to him to realize Rey felt safe enough around him now to just...let go. He’d been hounding her to relax for a few months now. 

Her cheekbones were lovely, her freckles were precious, the curve of her clavicles enticing. The slender hourglass of her body beneath the sheet wasn’t what he might have once called his “ideal” figure in a woman, but it seemed perfect to him now.

Rey twitched in her sleep a bit, and it roused him from his musings about her goddamn _freckles_ , for fuck’s sake. _Kylo_ , he admonished himself. _Sounds like you’re catching feelings._

He cleared his throat gently in an attempt to wake Rey. He’d love to let her sleep, but she might have things to do tonight. Kylo nudged her shoulder. “Rey,” he whispered.

Her eyes flew open and she blinked a few times, getting her bearings. “I’m so sorry!” she gasped.

“Don’t be,” he said, shaking his head and smiling down at her. “I think it’s a compliment when my clients fall asleep on me,” he joked.

Rey just grinned sheepishly and rolled over, picking up their usual banter once more.

 _Situation normal_ , Kylo thought, and carried on as usual, torturing himself as he did every other Tuesday with the sights of her slim back under his hands, her tiny ankles circled by his fingers, her powerful thighs beneath his palms.

 _This has to stop_ , Kylo reminded himself.

But oh, how he wished it never would.

* * *

With Rey's permission, he’d gotten her number from Phasma, and he had wanted to text her immediately. But, like an actual adult, he waited until the next morning after he’d finished his own workout, knowing she’d be winding down from a run at a similar time.

**_Have a good run, Rey? It’s Kylo._ **

_Good morning._ She replied immediately and he grinned, her message waking him up more effectively than the coffee, workout, and cold shower he’d already had.

 **_When do you want to join me for a workout?_ ** Best to keep it professional, he reasoned.

 _Is tomorrow too soon? ;)_ Shit, a winky face. What did that mean? What did the kids today mean when they used fucking emojis???

 **_Not at all_** , he replied. **_6 am?_ **

_See you there! :)_

Kylo grinned in relief.

* * *

It was the work of a single gym session with Rey to figure out that she was just as enjoyable and pleasant and attractive and perfect first thing in the morning as she was in her evening sessions with him. When she bounced into the gym that first morning, her hair bobbing in a single bun, legs clad in tight black yoga crops and her lean arms shown off in a lavender tank top, Kylo almost dropped the bar he’d been holding over his chest.

She’d sauntered over to his bench, post-run protein smoothie in hand, and given him that cheeky smile. “Need a spot?” she’d asked, taking in the amount of weight he pressed. She smirked, clearly enjoying her position at his head, their views reversed from how they normally were at her massage sessions.

Kylo just scoffed and continued his reps, trying to stop his hands from sweating at the sight of Rey leaning over him. After he’d finished his set, she’d promptly disabused him of any notion that she’d need help with her form; she deadlifted like a champ, handled free weights like a pro, and nearly made his eyes pop out of his skull with her low, perfectly controlled squats, her tightly-clad ass taunting him as if she’d dressed just to torture him.

Though their meetings were indeed torturous for Kylo, he still counted down the minutes until he could see her on Tuesday afternoons and Thursday mornings, when their sessions at Resistance had become a regular thing. They texted often, bantering about fitness, music, and school. He got her to send him a selfie--for her “contact photo,” he’d told her--and he spent an unhealthy amount of time zooming in on her face to memorize her features.

His dreams continued, growing more vivid as he saw more and more of Rey; he had learned her body, he knew the sounds she made when she was tense or relaxed, he knew the way she looked when she was fresh, the way she smelled when she was sweaty, the way her words slurred when she was tired.

It wasn’t hard to figure out that having seen so many sides of Rey, he’d begun to fall in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time, Rey and Rose have a girls' night...and your patience with the slow burn will be rewarded. :)


	4. in my space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Kylo take things to a few new levels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Thank you for all the lovely comments and kudos on earlier chapters! You guys make my heart happy! :)
> 
> Enjoy the, uh...violation of social distancing in this chapter. But the real filth is in the finale. ;)
> 
> Thanks always to the fabulous gals at @reylomoodies for this moodboard!

Rey’s shins hurt like a _bitch_ , but she knew she had to keep going. There was no other alternative, really; she was still a good mile away from her car and walking wouldn’t help this crippling pain go away any sooner.

So she limped on, breathing heavily, no finesse in her stride, her running playlist mocking in her ears rather than urging her on like it normally did.

When she finally arrived at her old beater, she collapsed into the driver’s seat and allowed herself a few tears for being dumb enough to get _shin splints_ of all the incredibly stupid runners’ injuries.

Rey drove home on autopilot, barely paying attention to the short journey through the haze of tears and the throbbing pain in her lower legs. The elevator was mercifully empty, and she stumbled down the hall to her apartment, longing for a hot bath and some ice cold compresses.

Shit, it was Thursday. Gym day with Kylo. She had to cancel.

 _Hey, I’m sorry, I can’t make it to the gym this morning_ , she typed hastily. _Have a good workout!_

His reply was almost instantaneous. **_Everything okay?_ **

_Yeah, just overdid on my run this morning. It’s nothing._

By the time she’d lowered herself into a steaming bath, her feet propped up on the edge of the tub, shins covered in cool towels she’d topped with ice packs, she was starting to feel the sweet sheen of relief, though the ice made her shins prickle with discomfort. She picked up her phone and saw several new messages from Kylo.

**_Rey. When you say “it’s nothing” you really mean “it’s terrible”_ **

**_What happened?_ **

**_Just let me know if you’re okay._ **

Shit. _Shin splints_ , she typed. _Not pleasant, but not the end of the world. I’ll be fine after resting for a few days._

**_Why didn’t you just say that, you stubbornass?_ **

She smiled. Yes, she’d heard that she was stubborn a time or two. _Didn’t want you to worry. I’ll be fine by Tuesday. See you then!_

 **_I can help._ **His reply was quick. Rey rolled her eyes; Kylo figured there was always a massage technique that could fix any problem.

_It’s really no problem. I’ve got ice on them now._

Almost as soon as she sent the text, her phone vibrated with a call from Kylo.

“ICE!” he groaned as soon as she picked up. “Straight ice on shin splints is the worst thing you can do. You need to alternate, warm and cool, but no extremes.”

Guiltily, Rey shifted so that the ice packs plopped off her legs and into the bathwater. “Uhhh, it’s always worked for me in the past,” she argued.

“Yeah, and it took five days for you to feel better, didn’t it?” he snarked.

Rey was silent. “...Maybe?”

Kylo groaned. “Rey, I’ll show you how to fix those. Let me come by quickly and help. I know you have class later this morning. It won’t take long.”

Rey caught her breath, acutely aware of her nude state in the tub, of the sweat still drying in her hair, of the pigsty that was her neglected apartment.

Of _Kylo_ in her apartment, huge and male and warm and sexy and _alone with her_.

She gulped. “I’ll text you my address.”

“Thank you,” he growled, “you stubborn, obtuse, mule of a--”

“Okay, Kylo,” Rey cut him off, laughing. “Got it. See you soon.”

She hung up and washed quickly, still smiling even after she finished her bath, stood, and hopped out with a groan. The grin slid off her face and Rey grimaced as she hobbled to her closet, where she grabbed loose athletic shorts and a tank top before flopping down on her bed to dress.

Rey was splayed out on her couch, morning protein smoothie in hand, when she heard Kylo’s knock on her door. She set her smoothie carefully on her coffee table and hobbled to the door. “Coming,” she called.

She opened the door to the sheer nirvana that was Kylo post-shower. For months now, he’d been taunting her during their workouts with those sleeveless tees, his biceps bulging, the gaps in his shirt teasing her with his massive pecs, the scent of his sweat alluring as they worked together seamlessly. Today, he still wore his usual gym garb of that tight shirt and loose black shorts, but he’d clearly taken the time to shower before leaving, as his hair was slicked back and curling over his ears endearingly. He smelled _amazing_ , like soap and leather and eucalyptus and all her favorite things, and she was _drooling_ at his hotness--

“Rey?” he was asking, right in front of her. “Are you okay?”

She shook herself. “Of course. Come in.” She stepped back, wincing at her train of thought and her legs in equal measure. She looked around her tiny apartment and tried to see it through his eyes, taking note of how large he seemed in her small space.

The living room served as an office and dinette, her small kitchen table nearly covered by a toppling stack of books and notes, abandoned mugs, and half-empty crisp packages. The couch faced the windows, where her collection of plant babies thrived in the deep window sills, and her running shoes and workout gear were piled haphazardly in the corner that led to her bedroom and bathroom.

It wasn’t much, but it was bright, and cozy, and homey, and Rey loved it.

Kylo had wandered to inspect her plants after kicking off his gym shoes near the door, and Rey hobbled to the couch. She tried to lower herself gracefully, but it was an even more lost cause than usual with her injury.

Kylo turned to her, smirking, as she collapsed down onto the couch with a groan. He smiled more broadly at her and she just pulled a pillow over her face, mumbling through it. “Want some coffee? A smoothie?”

She felt his hands at her feet and jumped, the pillow flying onto the floor. “I’m fine,” he answered, smiling as he lifted her legs and sat down on the couch, gently placing her shins in his lap.

 _Oh lord,_ she thought, her heart beating wildly. This felt far more intimate than their massage sessions, Kylo looking so _right_ in her space, their shoes jumbled by the door, her feet in his lap, his hands on her bare legs, as though they did this every morning before they left for class, right after they’d had morning sex and then shower sex and then counter sex with their coffee--

Rey shot upright, ripping herself from her thoughts, but Kylo pressed a hand to her shoulder. “Relax, Rey,” he muttered. “I feel like that’s all I ever say to you.”

She flopped back onto the couch, groaning at his touch as he rubbed her feet gently. “How far did you run this morning?”

“Only four miles,” she said, “but I started hurting after three.”

“Why didn’t you stop?” he asked, his hands starting to massage her ankles, gentle where they met her shins.

“Out and back,” she groaned, her back arching at his touch, which was making her feel anything but relaxed, but at least she wasn’t hurting so much anymore. “I was still a mile away from my car.”

Kylo growled. “Rey,” he admonished, lightly trailing his fingers up and down the front of her legs, feeling her out as he touched her shins.

Rey winced in pain. Kylo smoothed his fingers rhythmically up and down her legs, and spoke softly to her. “Shin splints are essentially little fractures. It’s important to loosen up the tendons before and after you run, and to _rest_ appropriately.” He glared at her in disapproval. “And you need to _stretch properly,”_ he rumbled. Rey closed her eyes in bliss. _I’d love for you to stretch me properly, sir,_ she thought to herself.

Kylo lifted her legs and rose from the couch; Rey opened her eyes and watched him as he placed a pillow under her calves, moved the coffee table, and knelt beside her. He laid his palm flat on the shin closest to him, his thumb cupping her outer leg, his fingers pressing on her inner calf, and he squeezed and slid his hands firmly up and down her shin.

Rey moaned in relief. The absence of pain was exquisite; when coupled with the pleasure his touch always gave her, she dissolved into a puddle of pure satisfaction.

Kylo was staring at her hungrily, watching her body writhing beneath his magical hands, her spine arching and her toes curling as she hissed.

“Unnnnhhhhhhhh,” she groaned, his thumbs hitting a particularly sore spot, and then retreating to press down on the tops of her feet, stretching the tendons and ligaments around her ankles. Rey panted as he repeated the motion, her legs tingling, her body floating.

“Rey,” he murmured, and she opened her eyes to look at him. His eyes were black, staring first at her mouth, where she’d been biting her lip between moans, and then her chest, where her stiff nipples were peaked, easily visible through the thin fabric of her tank top.

Rey couldn’t even bring herself to muster up her usual embarrassment at her body’s reaction to him; the journey from pain to pleasure had been so intense that she was beyond caring. Maybe he didn’t care that she was into him; she was _so_ into him, but even if he never reciprocated her feelings, the way he _touched_ her, the way he made her body _feel_ \--

Rey couldn’t tear her eyes away from his as they devoured her. She panted for breath, her chest heaving, body arcing toward Kylo in a charge of electricity and lust. He was leaning over her, and she was rising up on her elbows to meet him; one of his large hands was still on her leg, the other easily reaching behind her neck to cup her head. He was so close, his lips so full, his eyes so dark they looked black, and she could see her own face reflected in them.

And then Kylo kissed her.

His lips were _actually_ on hers, and she wasn’t dreaming, and she let out a wanton moan and opened her mouth to welcome his seeking tongue. His other hand left her leg to cup her jaw, powerful fingers cradling her skull as they’d done countless times before, but not like this. _Never_ like this.

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that he was a _miraculous_ kisser; he was as in control of his mouth as he was all the other parts of his perfect body, his lips slanting over hers confidently, his teeth nipping her mouth, his tongue sliding hotly against hers. Still, she needed more; she needed to touch him, too.

Rey launched herself off the couch and against Kylo; he caught her with ease and sank back onto his haunches, Rey straddling his big body, their centers pressed together and her ass resting on his powerful thighs. She kissed him hungrily, starving for more of his dark flavor and the tantalizing taste of his mouth. Kylo banded his arms tightly around her back and she finally, _finally_ got to fist her hands into that gorgeous hair of his. It was still damp from his shower, thick and fragrant and soft, and she ground against his body as all her fantasies came true.

“Kylo,” she moaned, her mouth free as his lips trailed across her jaw and nipped at her ear. “Kylo, Kylo--” she was chanting his name, urging him on as his tongue slid down her neck, beyond impatient for him to rip her clothes off and fuck her until she couldn’t remember her name or his--

“It’s Ben,” he was murmuring. _Wait,_ what? _Had_ she actually forgotten his name? Rey pulled back, gasping, to look into his eyes, dark with lust.

“What?”

“My name is Ben,” he said, his deep voice rumbling in his chest, vibrating against her body. His hands still cupped her shoulders, holding her close, but Rey inched away.

“What do you mean your name is Ben?”

“My call sign in the military was Kylo,” he explained, his chest still heaving, fingers clutching at her shirt. “When I got back I just...felt so different. I wasn’t the same person I used to be. So I kept my new name.”

He paused to slide one hand up her back, his fingers coming to cup her neck, his thumb rubbing against her jaw. “I just--I think I feel like Ben again.” Kylo--no, _Ben_ \--was looking at her with wonder in his eyes, as though he might be having an epiphany. Rey leaned back, bracing herself on her shins--

“Oh, _fuck_ ,” she screeched, pain splintering up her legs with the movement, and she tumbled backward, thumping into the couch with a clumsy yelp.

“Shit,” he cursed. “Rey, are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Rey gasped, struggling to push herself upright. Kylo (Ben?) rolled his eyes and scooped her up off the floor, bridal carrying her down the hall to her bedroom. He gently deposited her on the bed, tutting as he smoothed her hair back from her face.

Rey could hardly see him through the tears pricking at her eyes, and she gulped back a sob. Her emotions were reeling, her shins were killing her, and her body was a live wire that had been so, so close to finally sparking, only to be cruelly yanked away from the flame at the last possible second. She was reminded that for all the attraction she felt for Kylo, she didn’t _know_ him. She didn’t even know his real name.

She groaned in frustration and closed her eyes, a tear leaking out between her eyelids. Oh no. No way. Rey didn’t cry--and she _definitely_ didn’t cry in front of anyone else.

“You should go, Kylo,” she ground out, gritting her teeth through her pain and discomfort and unease. “Ben, Kylo, whoever you are. Just go.”

She opened her eyes to glare at him, determined to drive him away and leave her to her tears.

His eyes had shuttered. He’d transformed before her eyes, from the sweet, hopeful, open Ben, back to the controlled, closed off, restrained Kylo. Her heart cracked a little at the realization, and she opened her mouth to take back her words--

“Yes,” he said curtly. “This was a mistake. I’ll go.” He backed toward the door, and Rey felt her heart break all the way in two at the thought that _she_ had been a mistake, that the kiss meant nothing to him but everything to her, that she’d managed to hurt him and push him away just when she’d been _so close_ to...something.

“I’ll be fine,” she murmured, wanting to assuage any speck of concern he might still have for her. It didn’t seem like he had any, though, since he turned on his heel and left her room quickly. Rey stared at the ceiling, tears pooling in her eyes, as she listened to him gather his shoes and leave her apartment, shutting the door quietly behind him.

Her vision blurred, and Rey groped for her phone on her bedside table as her tears dissolved into full-on sobs. This called for reinforcements.

 _Rose_ , she texted. _Girls night tonight, here, 5:00. Emergency._

Rose replied immediately. **_Red or white?_ **

Rey smiled and sobbed out a laugh at her friend’s constancy. Rose was always there for her. _Red_ , she replied. Rose and Finn would always be there for her, Rey knew, letting her phone drop onto the bedspread beside her and allowing her damp, swollen eyes to slide shut as she cried.

Yes, they’d be by her side. Even if no one else ever would.

* * *

Across town, Rose frowned at her phone. Rey was a white wine girl, through and through. Red wine could only mean one thing: boy trouble. Rose gritted her teeth and growled at the thought of someone hurting her Rey. It had to be Kylo, that dumb jock, and Rose didn’t care how much bigger he was than her--she’d rip his testicles off with her bare hands if he fucked with her Rey.

She texted Finn, who’d already departed for work, to alert him to the emergency status of the girls’ night ahead--Finn was always included in girls’ nights--and he quickly agreed to meet at Rey’s bearing the usual provisions of chips, queso, and chocolate.

“Armie, my darling,” she called out, tossing her phone down on the kitchen counter and striding down the hall. “Armie, weren’t you enlisted with some crazy fool named Kylo?”

She rounded the corner to her bedroom, where Armitage was still looking adorably mussed, nursing his first cup of coffee. Rose smiled tenderly; her honey was just not a morning person.

He yawned widely and opened his arms to her as she settled down beside him on the bed. “Yeah, Kylo. Good guy, but ruthless. Intense.” He yawned again and groped for his coffee.

Rose snagged it off the nightstand and pushed it into his hands before he could knock it over, as he’d done countless times before.

“Well, ‘Ruthless Intense Kylo’ has just messed with the wrong girl,” Rose intoned darkly.

Armitage blinked. “What?”

Rose quickly filled him in, describing Kylo to her boyfriend, who agreed that it must be the same guy.

“Rose, he was a little damaged after we got out, but I don’t think he’d deliberately mess with Rey. He just wasn’t an emotionally manipulative sort. More of a brute strength sort of guy.” He was perking up, recognizing the gleam in Rose’s eye as something that signalled trouble ahead.

“Well, if that’s the case, then he’s actually just as big an idiot as Rey is.”

Armitage grinned. “Sounds like they’re perfect for each other.”

“Oh yes,” Rose said, rubbing her hands together. “Even if hurting Rey was a mistake, we aren’t going to go easy on him.”

Armitage growled and finished his coffee, reaching back to sit his empty mug on the nightstand. He missed, as usual, and Rose heard the shattering of crockery as her boyfriend rolled her underneath him on the bed.

Rose didn’t mind sacrificing a cup here and there, she supposed, grinning as he yanked her hips to his and proceeded to _thoroughly_ make her forget all about coffee mugs, drama, and her idiot friends.

* * *

After a day of reconnaissance, Rose had gathered all the information she needed. From Poe (through Finn), she’d learned that Kylo definitely had the hots for Rey. From Armie (through his old teammates), she’d learned that Kylo was actually Ben Solo, estranged son of Leia Organa and Han Solo, with whom he’d had a falling out before his enlistment. From Phasma (through Kaydel, by way of Poe yet again), she’d scheduled an “intense stone therapy” massage for Rey the next day...with Kylo as the clinician, of course, and with Rey booked under an assumed name.

Pulling this off was going to take all of her cunning, and she didn’t want to give Rey time to chicken out, Kylo time to stew over his undoubtedly complicated feelings, or any of the other meddling forces of the universe time to interfere.

If all went well, Rey would have the best weekend of her life.

If not...well, Rose was prepared to nurse her friend through heartbreak, but she didn’t think she’d need to. According to everyone at First Order, this idiot Kylo was absolutely gone over Rey.

She rolled her eyes in aggravation at the sheer idiocy by which she so frequently found herself surrounded, and knocked on Rey’s door at precisely 5:00. Over one arm, she’d slung a bag stuffed full of wine, makeover tools, and every woman’s secret weapon: extremely tiny lingerie. In the other, she cradled a big bouquet of flowers. There was nothing like some floral cheer to brighten up a gloomy mood.

When her friend opened the door, Rose was glad she’d gone a little overboard on the prep. Rey’s eyes were puffy from crying, her hair was a greasy mess, and she was hobbling like a hunchback in her rattiest robe.

“Oh, Rey, you poor thing,” Rose crooned sympathetically. “Auntie Rose is going to make it all better.”

* * *

Several hours, four bottles of wine, three facial treatments, an eye mask, and a pedicure later...Rey thought she _might_ be feeling better. Finn and Rose were here, making her laugh, watching reruns of Schitt’s Creek with her on Finn’s iPad, brightening up her apartment with flowers and queso and dark chocolate. They’d listened to her recap of the morning, had a lovely man bashing session, and took silly selfies of their made over selves.

Rose poured the last of the wine into their glasses and settled back into her corner of the couch. “Sweetie,” she began, and Rey tensed up. She knew what was coming.

Finn jumped in, always keen to rescue Rey. “Look, Peanut, we all know you have feelings for Ben. Let’s start calling him Ben, okay? That’s his name.” He took a swig of wine, then waved his glass around as he continued his monologue. “And he obviously has feelings for you. And he’s turning into an even better person all the time!!! Poe says so.”

Rey giggled at Finn’s tipsy enthusiasm. “Poe will say anything to make you happy.”

“Nooooo,” Finn singsonged, drawing out the word. “Poe will _do_ anything to make me happy. Up to and including--”

“Annnnnnnd I’m gonna stop you right there,” Rose interjected, standing. Then, apparently deciding just standing up wasn’t enough, she climbed up onto the coffee table, raising her wine glass high in the air, the red liquid sloshing dangerously close to the rim.

“Ben loves Rey. Rey loves Ben. So we need to _get Ben_ ,” she declared dramatically.

Rey rolled her eyes. Through the haze of alcohol, feeling like Ben was an impossibility was just a bit easier to manage. It felt...silly, absurd, comical--rather than earth-shatteringly sad.

“Commencing Operation Commando!” Rose proclaimed.

“Wait, wait,” Finn slurred. “I thought the whole point was for Rey to wear the sexy underwear. So she’s not going commando--”

“Hold up,” Rey interrupted. “You guys _planned_ something?”

Rose scoffed and hopped off the table, stumbling only slightly. “Well, of course we did. Finn and I decided we would take matters into our own hands if you two hadn’t gotten your heads out of your asses before summer ended, and we’re getting pretty close.”

Finn rubbed his hands together and cackled with glee. “Rey, do you trust us?”

Rey looked at her friends, so earnest, so good, so...drunk. She sighed, knowing she would do anything in the world for Rose and Finn. 

“Great,” Rose said, clapping her hands. “Here’s what you’re going to do.”

* * *

If Phasma thought there was anything strange about one of the clinicians deciding to change their name, she didn’t show it. She just nodded at Ben when he asked her to address him by his old name from now on, and to please communicate the update to his clients.

Despite gaining so much clarity about his identity the day before, Ben wasn’t enjoying any of the lightness or purpose such a revelation was supposed to bring. He felt heavy, sluggish, dim. Still, he’d learned too many hard lessons about letting his emotions spiral away from him, so he knew that despite feeling shattered about Rey, he had to keep up his routines.

So he had gone to work. Gone home. Avoided alcohol. Got up. Gone to the gym. Come to work again.

But he still felt like shit.

Ben couldn’t forget the look of betrayal he’d seen in Rey’s eyes. Was it because he’d kissed her? Because he’d kept his true name from her? Both?

He couldn’t blame her. She was so luminous, so pure--she deserved someone amazing, not a broken, emotionally ravaged hulk like him.

Somehow, he slogged through the day, dodging Poe’s prying questions, Kaydel’s sympathetic glances, and the curious questions he got from regular clients.

Afternoon coffee in hand, Ben sat in the break room in his usual chair, his head leaning back against the wall, eyes closed.

He opened them when he heard footsteps and looked up to see Kaydel knock gently on the door frame. “Your next appointment is here, Ben. Kira for a 90-minute intense stone massage. She’s in room seven.”

Ben frowned. “I don’t normally do stone massage, Kaydel.” He stood, shaking his head. “And I don’t have any clients named Kira. Why didn’t Phasma give this one to Poe, or...well, anyone else?”

Kaydel just shrugged. “Hey, I just date her. I don’t _actually_ know what goes on in her mind.” She left the room and Ben chugged his coffee and walked down the hall.

Knocking softly on the door to room seven, he rolled his neck for what he knew would be his last session of the week, though it may as well be his longest, since he felt so out of practice with the hot stones.

He pushed open the door and stepped in, keeping his eyes averted as he always did in case a new client wasn’t decent.

“Hello,” he began. “I’m Ben, and I’ll be--”

There was no way he could finish that sentence. Because there before him, on the table, was a naked woman.

Well, mostly naked. Her long, tan, toned legs led up to a ripe peach of an ass framed in scraps of red lace and crisscrossed black straps. The smooth arch of her back led to chestnut locks scooped up in three buns, a few curls spilling out to brush her shoulders. Her decidedly _bare_ , gorgeous shoulders.

Ben’s breath caught in his chest.

Rey lifted her head from where it had been pillowed on her arms and smiled lazily at him.

“Hello, Ben.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I for one can't wait to see where this leads, eh? ;)


	5. touch me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Operation Commando is a go!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is 90% smut and 10% fluff. Or maybe just 100% fluffy smut. Happy weekend! :)

Rey knew she could do this. She had to do this; wanted to do this; _needed_ to do this.

She’d blushed as she checked in with Phasma, who’d given her a wink and pointed her down the hall. Rey crept into a room as stealthily as possible, breathing deeply as she stripped.

“Operation Commando,” she kept whispering to herself. “Operation Commando.” She shucked her clothes messily into a pile and kicked them under a chair, pulling out her phone to check her hair and makeup in selfie mode. She was bare all over, freshly shaved and buffed and lotioned; she wore nothing but an obscenely sexy pair of lacy red cheekies that cut high over her hips. They accentuated her small waist with crisscrossed black straps that led in a vee down to her center, and just the act of wearing them was enough to make Rey shudder in arousal.

She checked herself out on her phone, and gave herself a pep talk as she silenced the device and tossed it in her bag. She looked good. She smelled good. She felt good.

And, most importantly, she _deserved_ everything that was good.

Rose had drilled these mantras into her mind for the past twelve hours, and Rey repeated them as she lay facedown on the massage table. She folded her forearms and glanced over her shoulder, making sure her ass looked great and that her breasts were slightly visible beneath her body.

She lay her head down on her arms, keeping her face away from the door, and closed her eyes, breathing deeply.

What if he took one look at her and left? What if he was horrified, or embarrassed? What if this backfired spectacularly and she never got to speak to him again?

Rey didn’t think she could bear it. Ben was amazing; kind and gorgeous and talented and a survivor; all the things she admired. She wanted him...wanted to be _with_ him.

A soft knock sounded on the door. A moment passed, and then she heard the handle turn. She heard him enter and shut the door. “Hello, I’m Ben, and I’ll be--”

Rey could hear his breath catch.

_Showtime_ , she thought, and opened her eyes.

“Hello, Ben,” she purred, turning to face him. He was gaping at her, drinking in the sight of her bare skin, hands clenched tightly in fists at his sides. 

Rey smiled, reveling in the feeling of leaving him speechless for a change. “I was hoping for a...different kind of massage today, Ben.”

He cleared his throat. “Well, yes--I, ah, we certainly…” he trailed off as she rubbed the toes of one foot up the opposite calf, spreading her legs slightly. Rey moaned a little for effect, though she really didn’t need to pretend. She was so turned on she thought that if Ben looked, he could see that she’d soaked right through the red lace that covered her center.

“Mmmmm,” she moaned, straightening her legs, pointing her toes, arching her back a bit so her chest rose up off the table, giving him just a glimpse of her breasts. “I’m so sore, Ben. Can’t you do something about that?”

He inhaled sharply and took a step closer to her. “Rey,” he growled. “I would fucking _love_ to. But are you sure--”

She looked imploringly up at him.

“Ben,” she replied. “Touch me.”

She could see the moment the leash he had on his control snapped. His eyes darkened, his lips pressed together, his jaw flexed, his brows lowered. 

With a lunge, he was on her, over her, everywhere. 

And it was _everything_.

Ben’s fingers were electric on her skin as he palmed her ass, groaning as his flesh touched hers, fingertips sliding beneath the red lace that framed her pert cheeks, hands kneading her bottom as he bent over her to press a heated kiss to the back of her neck.

“Ahh, Rey,” he panted, sliding his tongue down her spine, mouthing between her shoulder blades as he rubbed her hip. “You’re so beautiful, so sexy.”

“Yours, Ben,” Rey gasped. “All for you,” and he slid his fingers between her legs to cup her center.

They both groaned as he touched her arousal, wetness soaking his palm, helping him stroke her through the damp red lace.

He clamped his free hand around her shoulder, forcing her to arch her back as he slid her panties to the side, finding her clit and making Rey squeal in pleasure as he rubbed the little bud between his fingers. Ben trailed his lips over her neck, sucking at her flesh with his plush lips, his tongue darting out to slide up her jaw. He wrapped his fingers gently around her throat and yanked her head up to meet his, dragging her into a kiss so heated it seemed to steal the very air from the room.

Rey felt his finger at her entrance and she spread her legs, rocking back on her knees to give him access, and one large finger slipped into her body easily. The stretch was delicious; she’d known his fingers would be like magic inside her.

Ben was still kissing her senseless; nibbled on her lips as he stroked his finger inside her body. He added another, Rey gasping her delight, as Ben slid his index and middle fingers in and out, rhythmically kneading her ass with his free hand. Rey could hear how wet she was, could hear the filthy sounds of his fingers in her, and she loved every second of it. She rocked her hips back against his hand, sobbing in pleasure at the way he touched her and spoke to her, so dirty, so raw.

“Do you hear that, Rey?” Ben murmured against her cheek, rocking his fingers in and out of her while his deep voice sent vibrations through their joined bodies. “I’ve told you about communication. Your body is telling me that this feels good, but I haven’t heard from you yet, sweetheart.”

Rey moaned loudly, her mouth almost drowning out the sounds of his fingers sliding in and out of her, but not quite. _“Fuck, yes,”_ she hissed, “feels so good, feels amazing, Ben, _Ben--_ ” She couldn’t stop babbling.

“You’ve been teasing me with this body for months,” he said, mouthing at the skin on her shoulder. “ _Months_. So I’m not ready to let you come yet.”

Suddenly, his hand cracked sharply against her bottom, and Rey yelped, her body arching up off the table. She gasped, clamping down on his fingers in pleasure. “You haven’t been a good girl, Rey,” he said, soothing the sting, rubbing her inside and out, pleasuring her with both hands. She writhed against him, pressing her clit into the table.

He spanked her again, and Rey cried out in ecstasy. “Teasing me with this ass.” Another crack of his palm against her upper thigh, and Rey moaned and wiggled against him, trying to shove his fingers deeper where they were still buried inside her. “Not stretching after you run, coming in here so _tense_ on Tuesdays.” _Crack_. “And now, this little stunt, fucking _hot_ little red lace, just for me--”

Rey moaned and felt herself gush around him, and she was _this_ close to coming.

“Ben,” she moaned. “Please, Ben, please, I’ll do anything--”

Slowly, Ben withdrew his fingers from her, licking her neck as he did so, his hand still cupping her center and soaking her clit with her juices. He slid his fingers up and down, rubbing her too gently to make her come but firmly enough to stimulate her just to the edge.

“Ben!” she shrieked, writhing beneath him as he pinned her down, her legs spread, face pressed against the table, his nose in her hair. 

With a sharp movement, he ripped the flimsy lace from her body and yanked her hips to the edge of the table. Her legs were spread, her arms bracing her body for whatever he would do next. She gasped for breath, waiting to feel his fingers enter her, or his cock, or anything, really--

And she moaned lustily as she felt his tongue against her clit, his nose pressing into her cunt, tongue sliding up her slit as his hands gripped her ass tightly and pulled her body back against his face.

Rey groaned, grinding against his lips. “ _Yessss_ , been wanting this since I first _saw_ you--”

She broke off as he slid his tongue wantonly inside her body, one hand leaving her ass to gently spank her, then coming between her legs as he slid two fingers into her dripping center.

“Rey,” he groaned against her. “Come in my mouth, pretty girl, good girl, sweet Rey, so perfect--” He curled his fingers, rough skin rubbing her inner walls, his tongue licking her clit between words.

With a wail, Rey exploded, her body arching, legs flexing as she lost her mind, coming harder than she ever had in her life.

“Yes, good girl,” Ben was saying, licking her greedily.

Rey floated back into her body, becoming gradually aware of Ben’s hands gripping her thighs, spreading her open over his face. He gave her one last lick and stood, hands sliding up to her hips, before he draped his big body over hers.

Rey hummed in contentment; she felt the length of his cock as he pressed against her ass, grinding slowly as he rubbed his fingers over her ribs and around her body to cup her breasts. Through it all, he kissed her gently, mouth open against her shoulders and neck as he worked his way to her mouth. She felt sated, satisfied--sublime.

She turned her head to meet him, panting as she came down from the last aftershocks of her orgasm, and she melted into his body as he took her mouth with his.

Ben pulled back and smiled lazily down at her.

“Hi,” he said softly.

She grinned back. “Hi, Ben,” she murmured.

He kissed her again, lingering over her lips, fingers stroking through her thoroughly mussed hair. “Let me take you home, Rey,” he said against her skin. “I want to keep you in my bed for _days_ , and I don’t want the first time I make love to you to be on a massage table.”

Rey shuddered at his words. “Yes,” she agreed. “But…”

Ben pulled back, looking at her.

“I really hope you _do_ fuck me on a massage table someday.”

Ben just laughed.

* * *

His apartment was nice. Clean. Large.

Just like him, Rey mused, watching as Ben almost shyly showed her around. She’d packed a bag, hoping for this very outcome, and had enjoyed the way his ears had flushed when she told him that.

They’d driven here together, in his very nice car, to this very nice part of town, and Rey lost a bit of nerve when she was faced with how different their lives clearly were. He was so perfect, and she was just...Rey.

Ben turned to her, sliding his hands down her arms to link their fingers. He drew her to him, and they swayed together, nose to nose, heart to heart.

“Rey,” he breathed. She heard him swallow. “I’ve been crazy about you for months.”

She exhaled. “Me, too,” she admitted. She separated one hand from his and reached up to smooth his hair away from his face. “Since I first saw you. The things I was thinking during that first session…” She blushed at the memory.

Intrigued, he wrapped his free arm around her shoulders. “Oh?” he said. “Do tell.”

His voice was so deep; Rey shivered as she felt it rumble in his chest. “I…” she licked her lips. The feeling of his hardness against her belly gave her the confidence to go on. “I wanted you to touch me that day,” she whispered. “I wanted to be alone with you, to let you do whatever you wanted to me.”

Ben groaned. “I wanted to do so many things to you. I still do.”

She gazed at him, hardly believing this was happening. “Ben, I--”

He shushed her with a searing kiss, his hand cradling her head, mouth pressing into hers, lips bruising. “Rey, this is not a one-time thing for me.” He pressed a kiss to her nose. “I want to date you.” He kissed her forehead. “To make you breakfast.” His lips brushed her hair. “To have you meet my parents.” His mouth trailed over her ear.

“But this weekend…” he slid his tongue down her jaw. “I just want to fuck you until you can’t walk.”

Rey groaned and her knees buckled. Ben was there to catch her, and he scooped her up, hands bracing her as she locked her legs around his waist, moaning as he walked her toward his bedroom. Rey clawed at his shirt as he strode down the hall, his lips never leaving her skin, hands stroking her bottom where she was bare beneath her cotton dress.

He released her long enough to throw her on his bed, which she dimly registered was a bouncy king, before he was yanking his shirt off over his head.

Rey’s mouth watered as she took in the sight of his abdomen, muscles glinting in the afternoon light, powerful arms flexing as he shucked his pants and boxers, standing bare before her. Her entire body shuddered in anticipation at the sight of his cock, hard and long and thick before her. She licked her lips and sat up, scooting toward him, and she let him pull her dress off so that she sat, naked and aroused, beneath him. She reveled in the feeling of being so small, so helpless compared to his size and strength.

Ben held himself still, and Rey drank in the sight of his perfect body. She smiled up at him and gently placed a hand on his hip. He sucked in a breath as she trailed it up his body, letting her eyes wander down his muscular chest, his big arms, the glorious vee of his abs. She could barely breathe as she finally slid her hands where he wanted them, fingers trailing down his stomach and hovering just above his cock.

“Ben,” she whispered, running one finger up his shaft, circling the head with her thumb and forefinger, unable to make her fingertips meet when she wrapped her fist around his girth and pumped him gently. “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted this.” She looked up at him, his eyes so dark, chest heaving. She flicked her tongue out from between her lips, licking his cockhead firmly, and she was rewarded with a loud groan. She sucked at the head, and Ben groaned and thrust his hips toward her.

Rey sensed him losing control, his fingers trailing along her jaw, big hand cupping her head as she started to bob her mouth up and down his impressive length. The head bumped her throat when he was only halfway in and she moaned, impatient to feel him inside her body.

“Rey,” he growled, and he wound his fingers into her hair and pulled her off him. A trail of saliva stretched between her mouth and his shaft, and he groaned as she licked her lips to catch it.

Ben hissed out a breath at the sight and knelt, falling over Rey on the bed so his chest was pressed to hers, letting his cock grind against her center. “I’m going to fuck you so good,” he promised darkly, his hands all over her, mouth licking down her neck and over her breasts. “So _hard_ ,” he said, pulling a nipple into his mouth, reaching one hand down to line his cock up with her entrance. “So _deep_ ,” he growled, shifting his hips so he barely teased her, making Rey moan wantonly, spread her legs, and angle her hips so he slipped in a little deeper.

“Ben, please. _Please_.” She was gasping, her hands clutching at his wide shoulders, and he pulled his mouth away from her breast and looked into her eyes as he thrust his hips into hers, cock slamming into her body, rubbing her just right. 

Rey opened her mouth in a silent scream, unable to make a sound at the exquisite, perfect pleasure of having Ben fill her up.

“ _Fuck_ , yes,” she panted, looking down to where their bodies were joined, the sight making her eyes roll back in her head.

Ben growled and slid slowly out of her, one hand coming down to pin her hips in place so he controlled their pace. He rocked in and out, teasing her, torturing them both. He looked down to where her body welcomed him, stretched tight around his girth, and she could see he fought for control.

“Look at you, my girl. You’re so perfect,” Ben murmured. He released her hip to slide his fingers across her stomach, hand dipping down so his thumb could rub at her clit. He fucked into her harder, Rey’s hips bucking up against his, feet digging into the mattress. 

“Give it to me, Ben,” she was moaning. _Finally_ , she could let her mouth say all the words that had been in her head since she’d met him.

Ben growled, rolling them so she was straddling his waist, her eyes unfocused, hair messy, looking completely wrecked. He gripped her hips and pushed her down on his cock, fucking up into her from below while Rey could do no more than hold on and take it.

He yanked her shoulders so her body was pressed flush to his, their mouths fused in a heated, passionate kiss. He felt her clench around him and he pulled away and slid his hand between their bodies to rub her clit.

“Rey,” he whispered. She tore her gaze away from the hypnotic sight of his big fingers, rubbing her so precisely, his thick cock, splitting her so perfectly. There was something in his eyes...something in his voice...in the haze of her lust, she couldn’t process it, but it felt important, essential, life-changing.

Ben slowed his pace, and he smirked up at her as Rey’s body squeezed him tight.

She rose up, pressing her hands into his powerful chest, and slammed her hips down against his. “Fill me up,” she ordered, and Ben’s head fell back, his eyes drifting shut as he moaned and flexed his hips against hers. Rey wrapped her arms around Ben’s neck and kissed his neck, his jaw, his ears. “I want to make you feel as good as you’ve always made me feel,” she murmured. “Let go, Ben. _Relax_. Show me how it feels.”

Ben gripped her hips so hard she knew she’d bruise, thrusting powerfully inside her one last time, groaning loudly as he pumped her full.

“Fuck, yes,” he growled, thrusting again, “Rey, you feel so good, so tight, so perfect, my love--”

Rey cried out and threw her head back, his words and the feeling of his release inside her pushing her over the edge, and she shuddered around him.

* * *

Later, as Rey stared at the ceiling of Ben’s lofty apartment, his fingertips absently tracing patterns on her bare shoulder, she let her imagination carry her away, as she so often did when he was touching her.

But tonight, instead of the sexual desperation she usually experienced, she longed for a more emotional connection than she’d ever allowed herself with any other person. It felt like Ben knew her so well...her body, her strengths, her weaknesses, her desires.

_But did he, truly?_ she asked herself. He’d bared his soul to her, shared his past, even opened up about an actual identity crisis. It was only fair she shared the ugliest pieces of her past.

“Ben,” she murmured, rolling into his body, cuddling close.

He grunted in response, pulling her into his side. “Yeah?”

“Just seeing if you were awake.” Rey fidgeted, feeling uncomfortable for the first time in hours.

Ben pressed a kiss to her temple. “Tell me what’s on your mind.” _Ugh_ , she lamented. He knew her so well.

She cleared her throat. “I’ve never...felt this way with anybody. Before.” Her words were halting, but Ben’s touch never faltered on her skin as he rubbed her shoulders gently. She kept talking, before her courage failed her.

“I didn’t have a family, growing up,” she whispered. “Whoever they were, they...abandoned me, I guess. I was in the system for as long as I can remember. My life, growing up, wasn’t easy. Wasn’t simple. I just wanted you to know, so you’d have...all the facts. Know what you were getting into with me.”

Ben rolled to face her, one large palm cupping her cheek, his gaze steady on hers. “I’m sorry you felt so alone. You didn’t deserve that. No one does.” His eyes radiated sympathy, warmth, understanding. His touch on her skin was gentle.

Rey buried her face in his neck. “Anyway, I never stayed in one place for long, and I just...never felt like I deserved to.”

Rey inhaled, trying to remember all that Rose had drilled into her mind last night and so many times before. _She was good. She deserved good things. Everyone did._

“But I do, now, with you,” she breathed. “I want to...have a home. To find a place to belong.”

Ben rubbed his nose against hers. “How about...to me?” He smiled.

“That sounds nice,” she whispered.

“You’re not alone,” he reassured her. His thumb stroked her cheek, and she felt a single tear slide down into her hair.

“Neither are you,” Rey murmured, and pressed her mouth to his, the words a benediction, a promise.

And they kept that promise--all weekend long, and far, far beyond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I upped the chapter count because these cuties deserve a whole chapter of HEA, but you can consider it an epilogue and rest assured that these morons are happy now. ;)


	6. the finish line

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've reached the end for these two lovebirds! Hope you enjoy. :)

_Three Months Later_

It seemed the whole city had turned out for the Chandrila Marathon. There were only a few hundred runners completing the full 26.2 miles, but with each athlete having a veritable fan club on the sidelines, the city streets were packed and the energy was high.

Rey entered mile 25 feeling happy, exhausted, and filled with determination. Her running shoes slapped the pavement rhythmically, though she couldn’t hear their steady beat over the roar of the crowd, her running playlist, and her own heaving breaths.

The field had thinned out considerably as they’d reached the last leg of the race. Whereas the beginning of the marathon began in a thick crush of runners, by the time a few hours had passed, everyone had spread out according to their pace.

Rey knew she wasn’t in the running (ha) for a victory, an age bracket win, or even a personal best. She was just there to have fun; to run the race that signified the culmination of her training over the last six months; to breathe in the crisp autumn air on this bright and brisk Sunday morning.

She entered her last mile with a grin on her face. So many blessings waited for her at the finish line. Finn and Poe, the world’s most adorably nauseating couple, had been dating for nearly as long as Rey had been training for this run. They’d decided to move in together, leaving Rose and Hux free to take their own relationship to the next level. Hux had proposed to Rose only a few days earlier, popping the question by handing Rose a coffee cup that contained only an engagement ring.

And then there was Ben.

Just thinking about the three months she’d spent with him made Rey’s smile grow even broader. Not nearly as broad as his chest, of course; he was still massive, and he may have gotten even bigger in the months since he’d finished his certification training. His free time had increased, along with his salary, so he’d divided his time between Rey and the gym while she was running.

He’d only recently switched jobs, becoming the lead trainer and physical therapist at Resistance Fitness, buying into the gym with Poe and a few other friends. First Order, it turned out, had long been running some questionable side businesses that resulted in their CEO, Palpatine, getting busted for tax evasion and money laundering.

For her part, Rey was now in her final year of school, with a lighter class load as a senior, and more time to work at the garage and to spend with Ben. It hadn’t taken them long to realize the garage Rey worked at, Chewie’s, was run by Ben’s father. Rey knew Han had a son, but hadn’t connected him with the man she once knew as Kylo. Ben was working to bridge the gap between the angry young man his family had last seen before his enlistment; with Rey’s help, family relations were almost cordial again.

Rey felt, for the first time in her life, that she had a family. That she belonged. As she crested the final hill of the course, rising above the city with only a quarter mile to go, she felt so light and carefree that she could’ve just leaped and floated to the finish line.

But she didn’t. She picked up her pace, brows furrowing in determination, sweat dripping down her brow as she ran closer to the end of this chapter of her life.

Sure enough, as she neared the checkered banner, she spotted Finn and Poe on the sidelines, screaming encouragement, both sporting wigs whose hair had been put into three buns. Rey grinned in spite of herself, and looked at Ben next to them, smiling broadly, clapping for her, waiting for her to run right into his arms.

Where she belonged.

* * *

After a cool down jog, the post-race celebration, and the mandatory sushi outing that followed all of her races, Rey found herself at Maz’s Cantina with her newly expanded friend group. Rose and Hux snuggled together on one side of the dingy booth, Rose surreptitiously admiring her new engagement ring when she thought no one was looking. Poe and Finn perched on stools beside the table, yelling at the television, the waitstaff, and each other in their excitement.

Rey sat beside Ben, his long legs cramped under the table so she could stretch hers out into the aisle. He had his arm around her, her shoulder nestled into his ribs where she liked it, head tilted onto his muscular chest. His fingers trailed along her arm as he mostly listened quietly to her friends’ antics as they recounted Rey’s big race and what the winter might bring.

“How are you feeling?” Ben murmured into her ear. “Sore?”

Rey shrugged, snuggling closer to his side. “Not really,” she replied. “I’m sure I will be tomorrow, though.”

Ben raised his eyebrows. “Really? Are you _sure_ about that??” His eyes twinkled down at her and she could see the telltale dimple that gave him away whenever he was teasing.

Rey’s eyes widened. _Oh._ “Actually…” she trailed off. “I do think my calves feel a little tight.”

“Maybe you need a massage,” Ben suggested casually.

Rey smirked. “Maybe I do.”

* * *

It was dark by the time they arrived at Resistance, long closed to Sunday’s gymgoers. Tipsy from the drinks they’d shared at the cantina, and drunk on one another, Rey and Ben giggled and stumbled their way to a massage room.

Ben kissed her, long and slow, absorbing the smell of her lingering sweat from the race and the beer he could taste on her tongue. There was no flavor of Rey he could get enough of.

He patted her on the ass and opened the door. “Get undressed,” he murmured against her lips. “I’ll be back.”

With a wicked grin, Rey closed the door in his face, and Ben laughed softly. If anyone had told him all those months ago that the fantasy he’d crafted when he’d first laid eyes on her would be coming true, he’d have called them crazy.

But here they were--Rey, naked and willing on the other side of a door--and Ben, leaning against the wall that separated them, anxious to have Rey as pliable as he’d always wanted her to be on his table.

He’d given her long enough, he reasoned; six months was definitely plenty of time.

With a perfunctory knock, Ben opened the door, delighted by the sight of Rey’s naked body draped over the massage table. She lay on her back, legs spread slightly, one hand busy between them as the other lay languidly over her head, fingers tangled in her buns.

Ben was already hard.

“Hi there,” he began professionally, moving to stand over Rey and watch her work herself. “I understand you had a race today and you’re looking to...loosen up some muscles?”

She moaned, staring at him as she widened her legs enough for him to see her dip one finger inside her glistening center. “Yes, please,” she panted.

Ben stood at the head of the table, taking out her buns as he always had, allowing Rey to free her other hand so she could cup her breast. He loved these moments--when she was so lost in the heat between them that she abandoned all sense of shame and took what she needed, whether from his hands or hers.

He loved to give her what she needed.

He loved _her._

“Tell me about your race,” he said, unbuckling his belt and undoing the button at the top of his jeans. Rey’s hands were moving more frantically over her body.

“It was...hard,” she gasped.

Ben made a sympathetic noise in his throat as he stripped his shirt over his head and flung it into a corner.

“And long?” he asked, stroking himself, one hand cupping her cheek, her face upside down and so beautiful this way, flushed and freckled.

“Yes,” she replied, removing the hand from her center and stretching her arm over her head to grasp him in her slick palm. “Long and hard,” she repeated. Rey arched her back, bending her head backward so her unbound hair hung off the top of the massage table, and licked around the tip of Ben’s cock. He groaned, overwhelmed by the view: the length of Rey’s body, stretched out before him, a place to give and take pleasure.

He slid his fingers down the center of her torso, thrusting his hips forward gently as she took him deeper down her throat. Ben could barely breathe as he hooked two fingers into Rey’s cunt, and the moan she let out around his cock threatened to finish him right then and there.

Yanking his hips back, he stood, circling the room quickly and grabbing Rey by the hips to pull her to the edge of the table. She was panting, lips swollen from her ministrations, and he guided her legs around his waist, driving into her with one smooth motion.

They groaned in unison as he began to thrust, Ben bending over her on the table, Rey holding onto the edges for dear life.

“I finally get to fuck you on the massage table,” he gasped out between thrusts. Rey laughed, and he could feel the echoes of it reverberate through their bodies.

Overcome, emotions a tangle of lust, joy, and giddiness, Ben surged forward to kiss her. He gripped her neck in his hands, anchoring her body to his with his hands firm on her shoulders as he rocked his hips into hers.

“Ben,” she breathed.

He smiled at her.

At _Rey,_ who he sometimes couldn’t believe had chosen _him._

Rey, who’d never been chosen.

Rey, who he loved.

 _I love you, I love you, I love you_ , he chanted silently, in time with his thrusts. He was lost in her hazel eyes, and suddenly he couldn’t remember why he’d never said the words aloud.

“Rey, I love you,” he said, and kissed her again as he thrust into her powerfully, and Rey came with a scream in her throat and tears tracking down her cheeks. She clung to his shoulders, riding out her orgasm, back arching, reveling in the magic of his touch, his words, _him._

“Ben,” she cried. “Ben, I love you so much, love everything about you,” she was panting, her orgasm seemingly driving her to an even higher plane of lust. “Love your hands, your mouth, your voice…” she broke off to moan as he ground his hips down against hers, feeling his rhythm stutter as she arched her hips and took over the pace. “Your eyes, your heart, your goddamn _hair_ \--”

He laughed again, so in love with her he could barely think, the pleasure she gave him overwhelming him inside and out.

“There’s just one thing I’m not sure if I love,” she murmured, her lips at his ear. His rhythm faltered.

“I just don’t know how it feels to have you give me _multiple_ orgasms on a massage table.” He lowered his brow to hers, laughing, hips never slowing, and he pressed a kiss to her lips. 

“Show me, Ben...so I can love that about you too.”

He grinned.

And he did.

And she loved it, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! This was my very first modern AU, and so fun to write! I have so enjoyed all of your comments and kudos along the way. Thank you so much!! I'd love to chat on discord or twitter...find me @dyadinbloom.


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